Laxative for the hand and mind

Given the chance, I usually won’t share my work or ideas in a public forum. I’ll attribute that to a fear of how my work will be received; a fear of rejection and isolation.

The shift from primary school to high school was probably where that fear was developed. It’s the time when I, amongst most others, began to consider image and status. The beginning of high school is also when nonconformity (being ‘different’) is frowned-upon by your peers.

Those image and status considerations stick around in adult life. Even after finding my ‘crowd’ I hesitate to let the work flow. There’s a blockage somewhere that grew from fear to a hardened anxiety.

I’m not sure if there is an easy way to clear the clog. My guess is that it needs to be slowly broken-down with high-pressure; an increased flow. I suppose the contents of said flow don’t matter too much. They just need to keep coming down the pipe.

Flow exposes that rejection and isolation are not real risks. Flow actually reinforces confidence and connects you to those who reinforce it once more. Flow gets stronger—not weaker—the longer it runs.

So, this is a note to self to get on with the job. Reject platforms’ metrics of validation. Put things out there (like this!) at a regular cadence.